For those of you that don’t know me, I am Rebecca’s husband, Ryan. I am usually behind the lens snapping shots of her in the latest trends. Or lurking in the background of her insta-stories waiting for a chance to unleash my Aaron Rodgers like charm on the world (Rebecca always says people start following her blog for her but stick around for me-I don’t know if that’s true but that’s what she tells me). When I heard what she was planning to do with #MoreThanASize movement I felt I had to share my first hand experience of how this mentality has positively impacted my best friend, Rebecca.
I’ve known Rebecca for just about half my life, seventeen and a half years to be more exact. Over that time I’ve become quite accustomed to the same routine year in and year out. It would be right around this time of year Rebecca would begin the battle to become the size that she thought would be ideal for bikini or beach weather. Break out the Walk Away the Pounds, or Pilates, whatever the new hot at home workout would be at the time. Usually the gym wouldn’t be involved because I think she was too self conscious to go workout in a room with other people. In her mind, all eyes would be on her and she wouldn’t want to embarrass herself in front of other people if she was using something incorrectly. Who am I to judge though? I workout in the basement for the same reasons and its just more convenient.
Once the latest home workout was started Rebecca would move onto the latest diet craze. I can’t remember them all but I do know there was Atkins, South Beach Diet, Nutrisystem, and the old staple of Weight Watchers. All of these seemed to work great in combination with her workouts. By the time beach season hit Rebecca would get to what she thought everyone would deem an acceptable body shape for the summer. She’d look great, stunning really, ready to show off to the world all of the hard work she’d put in over the winter.
At the end of the day, though, who was she really trying to impress? I personally think she looks stunning all the time, no matter what her size. In her eyes, I am her husband and I am supposed to say to that though. I think, for that reason, my opinion on how she looks really means the least when it should really mean the most (next to her own). Not be rude, I don’t really care how she looks. I care more about how she feels. Is she happy about herself, her career, our relationship, her children, her parenting, etc? Those are the things that really matter and to me that is what makes her a beautiful person-not her weight or her style.
Was there also someone or something that she needed to be super skinny for? Yes, society! I do think there is an outside pressure from society, the Hollywood types, social media, etc. to look perfect or be a certain size because that is what we see on television each day. Quite honestly, its unrealistic and unattainable for many “normal” women or men to attain the typical Hollywood body. There is only so much time in the day to be able to work, parent, workout, fight to be skinny, get glammed up, and sleep. Something has to give and I think it should be the fight to look perfect. How you look shouldn’t define who you are.
I think Rebecca finally realized this over the last couple years. She was tired of the daily struggle of starving herself and staring into the mirror wondering how everyone thought she’d look. Rebecca realized that she wasn’t truly happy with who she was. Did she really want her kids to see and hear her each day questioning her size or worrying about whether or not she could squeeze into a size six? Did she think I really wouldn’t love her if she wasn’t skinny? Our girls don’t care and I don’t care. Rebecca is more than a size to us. To us she is a mother, an entrepreneur, a friend, a lover, a trendsetter, a beautiful person (inside and out), and so much more.
Everyone of these pictures I chose shows a beautiful person. Society tells her she’s most beautiful when she is her smallest. Society doesn’t care how unhealthy it was for Rebecca to get to her skinniest.
F— society! I’m with Rebecca everyday and witnessed the daily struggle to be somebody she wasn’t. It wasn’t pretty at all. She’s most beautiful to me when she’s her happiest with herself. When she realized she’s more than a size! She realized she’s a Mom, a friend, an entrepreneur, a wife, and who God wants her to be. She walks with confidence in herself everyday and you can see it in her. I am proud to call her my wife!
It actually took her close to 35 years but I think Rebecca is finally and truly happy. She is comfortable in her skin and has accepted that her best actually has nothing to do with her size. Rebecca can finally see what I’ve seen all along-she is #MoreThanASize.